TC the Terrible

The promotion list came out the other day and guess whose name wasn’t on it. If you guessed mine you’d be right. Not that it wad all bad news.

I rated high enough to qualify for promotion,, but not high enough to make the final cut. Which is a two edged sword because the final list is never released. Yes indeed National Security is at risk if a mid-grade promotion list is made public. This list is so secret that those of us on it are not allowed to see our scores. I was told “it was really close at the top you were smoking hot”.? If that’s true how smoking hot was the female that got out of deployment by getting pregnant?? Because that sure as Hell happened.

Sour grapes?? You bet. I’ve done everything right for the last six years and I’m rewarded with “take another lap” and “we don’t know why”.? That’s fine, but don’t promote the shit heads and expect me to be good with it.

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Thanks to all of you guys from Homeland Security, DEA, Navy Network Information Center, The Brookings Institute, Pew Charitable Trust, those two blocked IPs from DC and The Executive Office Of The President USA for dropping by. If I need to pull a D.B. Cooper and jump from the plane now, let me know. I’d like to at least think that I had a chance to get away.

A quick tip of the hat and thanks to DCblogs for the mention, even if they had to cavet it first with the typical PC disclaimer – “This post is not for the easily offended or extremely PC-minded.”

I didn’t ask, I’m not telling and I really don’t care.  As long as you’re not trying to shove your junk in my ass.  And as long as you’re not trying to grab my junk.  The Venn diagram to the left is pretty liberal (left – liberal, get it?) regarding who gets to touch your junk.  And frankly, I’m pretty sure that any gay guy joining the Army for the purpose of junk grabbing is picking me last.

In fact, none of the gay guys I’ve served with have ever made a pass at me.  Which doesn’t bother me in the slightest, since I’ve had more than my share of gay waiters, flight attendants and the like hit on me over the years.  The idea that America’s Army will be any less capable of killing the enemy because rump riders get to go public is absurd.  None of the gay guys or gals I served with in Iraq last year caused problems in the unit.  The straight couples cheating on spouses were a much bigger issue.  And the teenagers that never went to college, those kids had revolving doors installed on their CHUs.  I hadn’t seen so many hookups since my pledge semester.

But not one incident of the gays getting into fist fights over who was banging the headquarters whore out of turn.  Seems like a good deal to me.

I’m not one to take a dick up my ass lightly, but I don’t give a shit what you do when you’re off duty.  In 23 years of service I’ve been in more than one unit that had a gay man or two in it.  Never had a problem before so I’m pretty sure that it won’t be a major issue going forward.

Of course there will be a couple of queens that enlist for the drama and attention.  They’ll wilt on the vine quicker than you think.  Then the world will move on and we’ll get back to doing what we do best – killing bad guys.