TC the Terrible

Pardon me for a moment while I go on a rant here.

I’m tired of all the bullshit artists and social engineering agenda freakls pushing assholes trying to deprive me of my God given right to fuck up my own lungs. I’m a grown ass man with a mind of my own and if I choose to smoke cigars that’s my damn business. Nobody forces me to spend the equivalent of a car payment every month on my dirty, vile little habit. I do it because I want to.

And because you fuckers won’t let me drive when I’ve been drinking.

Smoking a cigar relaxes me. With a house full of estrogen and a job that directly impacts whether American heroes live or die my stress level is off the fucking charts.

Every day is some type of crisis in my world. I need a way to unwind that doesn’t involve shooting the people that cause me problems. Two things help in that regard; booze and cigars.

Sounds primitive I know. Some things in life aren’t all nice and pretty. Hell, when you peel back the layers there’s not a lot in life that is nice and pretty. Most things in the world are as nasty and disgusting as a coal miner’s lungs. That’s why we place such a premium on physical beauty. And why we always say that shit is only skin deep.

The truth is life is ugly and the weaklings among us keep trying to clean it up by creating rules for the bold and brave to follow. Americans today are scared of taking risks. It’s one of the reasons our politicians run like bleating sheep to provide “universal health care” for a nation whose majority didn’t want it. It’s also why we tie up our police departments with seat belt check points that keep them from putting a dent into gang related crime.

Our nation was built by guys willing to risk their lives for this strange concept of a government that was responsive to and held accountable by its people. When did we lose our collective set of balls? God knows that our forefathers wouldn’t have stood for half the shit we think of as normal today.

So, if my cigar smoke bothers you – go fuck yourself. I’ve got bigger problems than your whiny ass. I’m an American with a set of brass balls the size of grapefruits. I’ve got a life to live and you’re getting in my way Fuckwad.

There’s a couple of things that I really enjoy – sex with my wife, whisky (without the ‘e’), sex with my wife and cigars.  In that order.  Naturally the goody two shoes that know oh so much more about how I should live think that none of that is good for me.

So far they haven’t found a way to keep me from having sex with my wife, but they are trying like Hell to take the other two away from me.  Which is why I’ve joined Cigar Rights of America.  These guys are on the front lines of the battle to let me choose to enjoy my life.

Across the nation there are more and more groups trying to define our lives for us.  CRA, like many of you, feel like people can do a better job of that than the government.  If you smoke cigars I highly suggest you join up today.  It’s money well spent.

TC

A lot has been made of the Newman Family’s latest creation.  Probably the highest praise was Cigar Aficionado ranking it as the best value for the money in 2009.  I can’t argue with those guys.  Seriously, I can’t.

At this point I’ve bought and smoked nearly three boxes in the past six months.  For a guy that needs a Ritalin IV 24/7 that’s a big deal.  After all, I’ve been known to change my mind about dinner faster than my waiter can turn away from the table.

The sticks that I’ve bought have all been Rubustos (5”x50), if you’re buying a different size your mileage and results may vary.  And remember too that I’m smoking these in the Iraqi desert, where the humidity is something less than zero.  More on that later in my review.

For starters the construction is excellent.  This cigar has a nice firm feel when you pull it out of the box.  It is a solid tightly rolled cigar that feels firm on your fingers.  The wrapper has a slight feel of oil, but is not at all slick or sticky to the touch.  The cap doesn’t stand out, but you need to be careful when cutting it off.  I’ve had more than one Brick House try to unroll on me when I was a little off on my cut. 

The flavor is great.  From the first pull you can taste the earth flavors.  The first inch or so has a “stiffer” taste than the rest of the cigar.  I’m not sure if this is by design, or if the dry air has that much impact on the cigar.  As you get further into the cigar it begins to mellow out just a bit.  There is still a complex taste that I think of as a blend of strong coffee and spices.  There is nothing to complain about as you get to the band (and slightly beyond). 

The draw is smooth through out the smoke.  The dry air here does cause a few problems in this area.  Because the air is so dry you have to constantly work the cigar.  If you’re not drawing on it at least once a minute it will go out.  Re-lighting too often kills the great taste so much so that I’ve thrown away several in mid smoke.

Like almost every cigar I’ve had in Iraq over the past six months the burn has a tendency to be uneven.  Most of the time I’ll get a burn that races down one side.  On occasion the fire will burn like a reverse cone burying itself deep in the cigar.  Again, this is strictly a product of the dry, dry air.

One of my favorite parts of any cigar is the smoke.  This cigar has a great full smoke.  I love the grayish hues it produces.  It hangs in the air like it was drawn there before disappearing.  A very good thing in my opinion. 

Overall, I think you are going to enjoy this cigar.  At roughly $5 a stick you can’t go wrong.